Post Warning: This is personal babble. Very long, personal babble. Not funny. Just some ‘housecleaning’ notes. Think of it as a little window in my desperately need therapy for this crap mind. I have been told from people who I complain to in real life about all the craptastic things I have going on I am not very forthcoming about my personal life on this site. The messy complicated side. Which is true. Because HELLO? This is a humor blog. But I am gonna give this a shot. So if this is a downer, just ignore this post.
Funny-entertaining-court-jester Marcy will be back tomorrow.
“Definition of Insanity: to keep doing the same things over and over and expecting different results”
After reading the wisdom of the Facebook update quote- I have been doing some thinking.
And I have decided a few things.
Basically it is time to do a little Spring cleaning……… OF MY LIFE.
I decided to quit doing some stuff.
Well specifically a bunch of stuff I do for free. I have been blogging for over 2 years, and in that time I have acquired well, a lot of free gigs. Basically the way it works is people with other websites/magazines/newspapers ask you to write for free. Bloggers do this in the hopes of broadening their audience and ultimately hoping to bring more readers over to their primary website (which in my case is this one). I have done this for several other sites in past…and thanks to Google Analytics it is pretty darn easy to see how many click-throughs to this site I am getting from those efforts. So I always give it a try…and see how it goes. And it always seems to go no where. I am just feeling like my time could be better served elsewhere. Like on my couch, taking a nap.
For the time being I will however continue to contribute to my blog at OCFamily.com and I was recently asked to contribute to OC Moms Blog as well. OC Moms Blog is interesting to me, because they are associated with a major syndicator- and many of the posts written end up syndicated in major newspapers all over the United States. Which again, is not exactly revenue generating – but who knows, maybe Random House will be reading that day and offer me a book deal. So it is something I will try for a short while as well.
Speaking of book deals. As many of my long time followers know, I was once was very close to getting a book deal for my AdTalk series. Unfortunately- while the agents and publishers loved the series, the copyright risks were too huge for anyone to take on. However, I have recently been strongly and lovingly encouraged by an insanely published author friend to put a book together with a collection of my stories. This mentor person thinks it is a slam dunk for me. I am not so sure. But that could just be the fear talking. So I have decided to block out and dedicate one day a week to do NOTHING but work on ‘the book’. This is a huge step and commitment for me. I am a chronic multi-tasker and perfectionist (read: often found going in circles to do everything but getting only something done), so dedicating any amount of time to ONE SPECIFIC GOAL should prove to be very productive for me. No more excuses.
I have made some other personal/friendship decisions as well. Need to stop running in circles trying to make friendships with people who clearly have no time or space in their life for anything other than acquaintance level friendships. So what if I die alone someday? I am sure by then I will be so famous I can buy a friend. Right? Sounds like a fantasy solid plan me thinks. And while I adore the few friends I have who live no where near me I will always be yearning to meet the Ethel to my Lucy. The Mary to my Rhoda. It’s possible it may never happen. I guess it is time to accept that and take up heavy drinking and move on.
Oh and another big change has come to this site as well. You may have noticed a giant button the left side bar called The Association Brand Members. Well that is something new that I am feeling very good about. As you know, I have pretty much eliminated all advertising on the home page. But I wanted to still earn some money a place for brand advertisers to show off themselves. So I created this little page with all my brands and sponsors represented. But it get’s better, because below the logos? Are direct links to my personal experience with the product/brands I have done for the brands. And I have decided to no longer accept any product reviews from brands that are not this Brand Page. Sure I love getting free random products. But I love building a brand relationship MORE. So they support me by advertising on the page, and I support them by reviewing and promoting their products. And not all brands are accepted. Only brands that have been ‘Association Approved’.
So there you have it. I am trying to clean up and organize my writing life a little, and learning to VALUE my writing. Realizing it is no longer something I should be giving away for free. Cuz up to this point I have been kinda slutty about my writing. Just giving it to anyone who asked and gave me free drinks swag. Seems to me there has to be a better way to spend my time. And the truth is…if you give it away for free, why on earth would anyone ever pay for it?
Will I regret some of these decisions?
That is the end of the story that I haven’t written yet.
Maybe it will have a surprise ending.
How did this post turn into a Natasha Bedingfield promo?
{ 17 comments… read them below or add one }
Congrats Marcy for finding the time and motivation to work on your book, once a week. Yay you!
I am TOTALLY hearing you! You have to “prune” to make room for “growth”. =)
Good for you. Take ownership of your work. This is just my opinion as a former full-time paid writer, but I do not like the trend of newspapers and other publishing entities encouraging people to write for them for little or no compensation. I suppose part of it is personal since so many of my former colleagues are laid off and are having a hard time finding work with a living wage. People who were once paid to work this hard do not want to do it for free. And when we find out others are more than happy to fill the gap at little or no cost, it just makes us lose hope that writing will hold value in the future.
I’m sorry the AdTalk book didn’t work out because it would have been a hit. I’d have bought a bunch to give as gifts.
I wish you the best of luck on your new book endeavor.
Funny how those thoughts jump, huh? From blogger to blogger, from writer to writer…..
Just get busy on your book. You’ll get there.
Oh, Mizz Marcy, you rock.
I love the branding page, and have even had the slightest little envy of the OC folks who get to meet you in person, because Redneck Central is about as far away from you as one can live (although you may be greatful for that) and I don’t get to meet you. Whimper.
I was sorry to read about the AdTalk book fizzling when youwrote about it…but now that I have something else to look forward to, my pain and dejection are lifting. OK, so maybe that’s a little ass-kissy for some folks, and a wee sarcastic, but I wouldn’t be me if I wasn’t a smart ass sometimes. I AM glad you’ll be finding/following your dharma, though. When you’re published I will, truly, rejoice. Meanwhile, fear not – I still have no plans to set foot in the mysterious beyond of California, so you can hold off on that restraining order.
Shade and Sweetwater,
K
When it comes to finally making the decision to get that book done, you really do just have to say the hell with everything else (ESPECIALLY the fear!) and block out at *least* one day a week. Think of it as a gift to yourself.
And I completely understand what you mean by the friendship situation. I’m in the same boat. It’s one of the reasons I haven’t been writing much at all lately. And now that I have it clear in my own head, who is worth my time, and who isn’t, and have stopped chasing the people who obviously aren’t interested in a reciprocal REAL friendship, it’s almost…well, it’s been like this huge weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. I have spent so much time chasing people who I “thought” I should be friends with, or trying to figure out exactly what those who were simply “acting” like friends, really wanted, that I’ve pretty much ignored or alienated the real, GENUINE people in my life and those in Bloggywood that ARE worth my time. It sucks to have to learn this the hard way, like I did.
I’m really bummed about the AdTalk thing, but I know you talked to my mom and she kinda explained the copyright issues to me and why that’s such a hurdle. I still think it would have been a slam dunk!
On that note, I’m really looking forward to whatever it is that you do publish. It’s going to be brilliant…just like you!
Well, I was buying this until you struck through the “take up heavy drinking.” Good luck on your “you” time… No one else can drink the wine on your lips.
Wow, Marcy, thanks for keeping it real. Sometimes we have to wade through a lot of crap to find the focus and it sounds like you have done just that. As far as friends, you may yet find your Ethel. I too am looking for my Louise. Your willingness to be a bit emotionally vulnerable in your blog is truly admirable and certainly has endeared you to me. ;-)
Kiddryn is right, OC is lucky to have you live and in the flesh.
Thank you!
Carolynn
I think you’re making good choices! You write amazingly well and you definitly shoud not be handing your talent out for free!
And I would totally buy your book!
Not only are you staying true to yourself, you are not selling out and while it may take longer to build that following you desire, those of us who “knew you when” will still know you then. Kudos to you. I have found that the friendships come and go and when I let go of the worry of a lack of BFF, she popped up right before me. You have hubby and two gorgeous boys, you don’t need other ladies, most of the time, we just enjoy cutting each other down anyways. Women are mean, nasty creatures. Ignore us.
Wait! No, we are wonderful, loving, nurturing people. Yes, I am. No matter what my homeschooled child tries to tell me…
I’m still loving you, even when you turn all serious on us.
You’re #1 stalker…
:)
This blog rings so true. We all have to step back occasionally and think about what we are doing, not doing, wanna do…
I used to BE someone’s Ethel, and it was great, but things change. I’m nobody’s Ethel, Louise, Rhoda, or anything, and I’m okay with it. But it would sure be fun once in a while . . .
Don’t think of yourself as having been “slutty” with your writing. It’s a natural progression of creating buzz: EXPOSURE. Well, you have the exposure, now take back your schedule. You’re on the right track.
But what do I know? I’m kind of a hick and a doofus.
Like you, foolery, i used to be someone’s rhoda. i would love to hear how you became okay with it because i am so not okay with it! and…i’m kinda a hick and doofus and redneck!
Good for you! You need to “blog out” in order to write that book! And I truly do adore the Ad series.
Btw, just read your post about BlogHer last year. I was appalled! I mean: if you were smiling at me and giving me eye contact, I would TOTALLY fly over to be your friends. What’s wrong with people? But glad to read more and found you ended up with a good time. So ppl weren’t completely crazy there. :-)
Nice job in your new venture. Always need to make progress in life…..Well said!!!!
I just found you are you are very entertaining. I don’t know how to make you feel better about this but I like you. But I’ve been drinking so maybe I’m not the best judge.
marcy, i applaud your decision to not give yourself away. that’s wise on many levels. also, here’s to your “association approved” page. that’s a brilliant and palatable solution to the “swag” conundrum. finally, kudos for your soul-baring. i admire you for that…