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Fixing a bad hair color. Or not.

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Something happened to me that has never happened ever before. I had a hair dye nightmare. I got my first gray hair when I was 20. Yes TWENTY. But it didn’t bother me much since everyone I knew was dying their hair and making it look fabulous, so I started too. I have gone jet [...]

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AdTalk: decisions decisions.

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So many men in bad suits, and so little time. I am sure some art director somewhere was saying things like “We will just SPLASH the paint over the backdrop! It will be DYNAMIC. And YOUNG and FRESH!” while using hand movements and smiling convincingly. Then the budget guy with the bow tie would give [...]

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AlbumTalk: Back-off you trampy single women.

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Music to keep your HUSBAND happy. How to strip for your HUSBAND. How to belly dance for your HUSBAND. Have I made myself clear you harlot?   Oh, what I wouldn’t give to see one of those ‘special instruction booklets’. The entire AlbumTalk series can be found here.

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Wonder if they make a contraception sock too.

SkyMall never ever fails to entertain me. Remember this from years ago? Well, lookie-here…Now you can by shoes with SPERM as their logo. Oh least you think this is some kind of cultural accident (like the shirts made in Japan that try to say American phrases like “Let’s Rock and Roll Baby!” and instead their [...]

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AlbumTalk: Blame it on Cuba.

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In an attempt to distance themselves from their Uncle Castro back in Cuba, the sisters added the ‘De-‘ to their last name when they came to America. The helmet hair and bushy eyebrow trend can only be considered  passive revenge for the whole Bay of Pigs thing. We retaliated with The Jonas Brothers. – - [...]

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AlbumTalk: When fame gives you a big head. And hat.

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  Even though Elna had added the blue ribbon, Rigmor knew it was her old ‘Hot-Dog-on-a-Stick’ hat. And no matter how hard she sat and prayed it was still there when she opened her eyes. “How would anyone take their music seriously with a hat like that?” she thought. Something had to be done about [...]

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AlbumTalk: Get your shoes off my pillows

The title WAS going to be:  "Songs for divorced balding older man who is trying very hard to act hip to impress severely younger blonde women that they bring back to their furniture-less bachelor pad to listen to some cool tunes and lay around on Romper Room colored pillows so they can be stared at [...]

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AlbumTalk: The Christ Messengers

. Apparently you must pile the hair on your head as high as possible to receive Christ’s message.Let the Lord lift you up people. Lift, curl and hold…(A special thank you to Association member. MomZombie for this Album cover. If you have a sec. Check out her blog. She is hardly zombie-like at all.)

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